{"id":12507,"date":"2019-02-19T23:03:06","date_gmt":"2019-02-19T23:03:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wordoftheprincess.dreamhosters.com\/?p=12507"},"modified":"2019-09-23T17:44:52","modified_gmt":"2019-09-23T17:44:52","slug":"gift-giving-affects-our-relationships-with-others","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wordoftheprincess.dreamhosters.com\/?p=12507","title":{"rendered":"Gift Giving Affects Our Relationships With Others"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of my friends was in town yesterday and I met them for coffee. Of course, we were talking about everything human, as we all do. We talked about politics, weather, relationships, children, and many other topics that we usually talk about with each other. This is until we hit the topic of them needing to buy presents for loved ones, and them noticing my husband\u2019s present. They commented, \u201che must be love you a lot\u201d. That comment made me think about presents and how we treat each other with them. An hour ago, I went to my favorite coffee place and saw my favorite barista running in front of me with a bewildered look, but in an uplifting bright mood carrying a bag of goods and flowers. Turned out it was for his girlfriend. <\/span><\/p>\n

That all made me think about how people give each other presents and how that affects our relationships. <\/span><\/h2>\n<\/div>
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I remember my neighbor always gave \u201cstars\u201d to guys based on their presents to her and sometimes she would describe their presents to me. I would think \u201cweird ranking…that present is so soul-less\u201d. Yet she would put a lot of emphasis on thinking that it meant something. I was still always very skeptical of her presents and, of course, those guys evaporated as fast as they appeared.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, I want us to take a look at presents themselves in order to understand why they are twisted in our society. To start, we need to understand what a present is. A present is a way of showing others affection, appreciation, being thankful for something, or bringing someone positive emotions.<\/span><\/h2>\n

If those are the cases, what should be the way we buy presents? First, we should be thinking about a person we want to give a present to. This means a present that we can\u2019t appreciate, but another person will. Correct? For instance, if you want to tell a girl you love her, you need to come up and say \u201cI love you\u201d, and she will hear that. This is better than seeing her in pain thinking that she will decode the message. We are not in Kindergarten right? So we should be thinking of what the other person wants and needs in order to really make a person happy.<\/span><\/p>\n

What do we do? In many cases, we buy what <\/span>we<\/span><\/i> want and what <\/span>we<\/span><\/i> like. We don\u2019t ask ourselves if that is correct, right? We just do it and expect another person be happy with our purchase. We get very upset and angry when our present not accepted in the way we wanted. Why do we puzzle that much if we bought it for ourselves? If you are happy about that present, that should be enough for you and it should not matter if another person doesn\u2019t care for that particular item. However, we get offended. So, if this is the case, we should refine our thinking and effort and start thinking of others desires in order to make THEM happy not US.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>

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Second, when we give a present we expect them to give us something in return. Whether it is an emotion or any other form of appreciation. Why do we do this? Again, because we are buying not from the heart but from the mind and therefore we usually fail. Buying presents is becoming a chore that we stop enjoying and eventually just don\u2019t want to do. Why are we surprised that holidays are becoming so commercial? We make them this way because our brain and heart are not in the right places. We are trying to buy something cool and expensive thinking we will be appreciated, and instead, we should be buying something maybe not even fancy. It should be something that would be needed and liked, but maybe not that fancy. <\/span><\/p>\n

You know what is strange? Our need for appreciation. Everything we do, talk, buy, etc we look for appreciation. Isn’t it crazy how broken we all are?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Men can\u2019t buy flowers for their ladies because they are afraid that they would be told something nasty or the ladies will throw those flowers at his face and ask for diamonds. <\/span>Ladies, on the other hand, wait for at least a flower. Even more twisted is the moment they get flowers, they throw those at a man\u2019s face.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>

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By the way, guys are more thankful for simple presents than women. Don\u2019t ask me why. I haven\u2019t thought about it but once I do, I\u2019ll write about it. <\/span><\/p>\n

So we live in a very twisted world where everyone wants to feel loved but do everything that doesn\u2019t allow anyone to show that love. We end up feeling crazy, lonely, scared, afraid to be left alone, etc.<\/span><\/p>\n

My dear readers, I know that the holiday season has past but let\u2019s try to be mindful of our friends, parents, spouses, and ourselves. Eventually, it is us who benefit if we give a present coming from the right place. We will be feeling happy for weeks. <\/span>We should give presents to others the way they want. Connect with them first in your heart, put yourself in their shoes, and ask yourself \u201cwhat would they like\u201d? Afterward, go for it – buy it. <\/span>Don\u2019t let your mind doubt you and thinking it is not fancy enough. Trust me, the fanciest and most expensive thing you can give another human being is when you do something with love, care, and thoughtfulness. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>

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